Romance, it’s not for sissies!
By M.L. Tyndall
By M.L. Tyndall
Do you know what I’ve discovered? Romance works best and is most enduring and exciting when men and women assume their God-given roles. Now, I’m not talking about keeping women home barefoot and pregnant while the men go out and work. I’m all for women having careers and getting equal pay for equal work. I’m all for women making themselves known in business, politics, and the arts. And I firmly believe God created men and women equal in all their rights. But let’s face it, He didn’t create us equal in our desires, temperaments, and needs.
Women want to be loved and cherished and taken care of. Men want to be admired, respected and depended upon. God made us fit together so perfectly! Why are we trying to change something that works so well? Why does the world want to make us equal in all respects? We aren’t. And personally, when we step outside of our roles, I believe it takes all the fun, all the romance, out of a relationship.
Who wants some wimpy, whiny man who’s so much in touch with his feelings that he seems more like a girlfriend than a husband? Who wants a man who falls apart during catastrophes, or one who cowers in the face of danger, or doesn’t work to support his family? I don’t know about you, but I want a man who’ll be stronger than me both emotionally and physically when hard times hit. Basically, I want a hero. And from the popularity of romance novels in our culture, I’d say most women agree.
Truthfully, there’s nothing more of a turnoff for me than a man who acts like a woman. And you can bet the same is true for men in regard to women acting like men. Men may respect a strong forceful woman, but you can bet if given a choice, they’d find the softer, more feminine, weaker woman far more attractive.
I suppose that’s why I love writing historicals. Times were simpler in days past. Men were men and women were women. Yes life was much harder and there were always bad guys, but what woman wouldn’t swoon with delight when her hero rides in on his black stallion, sword at his side, to rescue her from some imminent danger? Call me a hopeless romantic if you want. I guess that’s what I am.
If you spend some time examining some of the more popular romance novels today, you’ll see the men are strong, heroic, decisive. They rescue and care for their women. They cherish them and make them feel safe and loved. Take the popular series, Twilight, for instance. The hero is strong, sure of himself, powerful. Hey, he’s even immortal! He takes care of his lady. And although vampires are not my type, I can see why girls all over America are so infatuated with these stories.
In novels where the women are strong and heroic, the heroes are even more so. I’m not saying that women can’t be strong. Of course we can. Men don’t respect weakness anymore than we do. But be strong within the confines of your womanhood. When you’re with your husband or boyfriend, don’t take charge. Let him be the leader.
That’s just how it works. That’s how God created it to be. And it’s these differences between men and women that make the relationship so magical. It’s what makes romance so utterly divine.